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Stress: What’s really important?
Know the difference between what is important and can be changed, and what is important but cannot be changed.
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Thomas Lavrenz often found relief from the stresses of his job as the longtime director of golf for the city of Cedar Rapids, Iowa, in things as simple as leading school children on tours of the city’s golf courses. |
Have you ever taken the time to reflect upon what really is important in your job and in your life?
Yes, family and faith are important. But at times something else drives us so hard that we can end up hospitalized — and perhaps even die. The thing I’m talking about is stress, and it can show up as a simple sleepless night or, in the extreme, take your life.
Stress happens at work, it happens at home, it happens on the road, it happens when we are trying to relax. Stress is everywhere.
Editor’s note: Four years ago, 18-year GCSAA member Thomas Lavrenz was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. One year ago he was also diagnosed with mitochondrial myopathy. Before being diagnosed with these diseases, doctors performed numerous surgeries on Lavrenz, including a nasal surgery that almost killed him. Doctors don’t know how much longer Lavrenz will live. These days he is unable to walk two, sometimes three days a week. In between come days when he feels better, well enough at times to go hunting. Last year, Lavrenz retired from his job as director of golf for the city of Cedar Rapids, Iowa. In his golf career, he has been an active member of GCSAA, working as a superintendent at such Iowa courses as Jones Park Golf Course, Squaw Creek and Ellis Golf Course. Lavrenz now spends his time enjoying the company of Julie, his wife of 25 years, and his five boys, ages 19, 18, 16, 12 and 8. We asked this longtime superintendent if he would be interested in penning an article for GCM, to which he replied, “Oh, hell yes.” The result is this article on stress and what is important in life. Though not a typical GCM article, we believe it holds meaning for our readers. Lavrenz currently is coping with his illnesses at his home in Hiawatha, Iowa. He can be reached at thomaslavrenz@gmail.com. |
Is it important, or is it stress?
People handle stress in different ways but some never come close to managing it. Stress may weaken some people too much to handle it, and some actually may use it as a crutch.
Ask yourself what the most important thing is for you in your job or at home, and then ask “Does this thing really matter?” Regarding your job, did you answer any of the following: healthy greens; pleasing the chairman and greens committee; pleasing your city manager; balanced budgets? Which of these are important and which involve stress?
The truth is that they are all important and they can all cause stress. You could ask the same questions slightly reworded for any part of your life.
There are those who have stood face to face with the medical monster of stress and have just given up. Yet there are those who will never give up, regardless of what is thrown at them. I used to think I was one of the best at handling stress. In fact, I used to think stress was good for me and helped me improve. To some degree, I still think a little of it is good for the body.
But recently doctors have found evidence that stress causes heart disease and can actually speed up symptoms of some progressive diseases. Although many people have suspected this was the case, numerous studies now offer scientific support of the belief.
What can and
cannot be changed
Everyone has challenges. The key to survival is distinguishing between what is important and can be changed and what is important but cannot be changed. Stress often results from not being able to differentiate between the two. You must recognize this, figure out what is most important, and then tackle it in a straightforward manner.
Time management is perhaps my biggest challenge. I’ve tried many times to master this art and I am improving. I always believed that once I started a job I needed to work until it was completed. While there’s probably nothing wrong with that, I wouldn’t stop there. I would start two or three jobs and then stress out when they didn’t progress as planned.
Last year, I was forced to make the toughest decision of my career. I decided that the most important thing to me was to retire on disability so I could live long enough to see my sons grow up.
Once I retired, I still had worries. Concerns about insurance and all the other things many take for granted kept me buzzing every day. But as the Bible states, “All things work to the good of the Lord.”
I was amazed and overwhelmed by the support of the Wee One Foundation, as well as that of our own association. Our church also came to our aid. My stress level has decreased, and while I still struggle, it’s not as bad as it used to be.
Before it’s too late, we all need to take time to re-evaluate and determine what really is important in our jobs and in our lives.
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As director of golf for the city of Cedar Rapids, Iowa, from 1996 until recently, Thomas Lavrenz learned that a lot of stress can be dealt with by asking the simple question, “What is most important?” For Lavrenz, the answer to that question is seeing his sons grow up. |
A common thread
While all superintendents are different, we have one thing in common: We belong to one of the finest professions in the world. This is not just a job to us … it is our chosen profession. All the way from the CEO of GCSAA to an assistant superintendent in Small Town, U.S.A., our association has been trying to help us recognize our own strengths and weaknesses and improve the quality of our lives. Now I want to help my colleagues in a similar manner.
Listed below are a few things I’ve done to relieve my anxiety and stress, on the job and off. I hope they can help you.
• Reflection time. Consider taking a 15- to 30-minute timeout at the end of each day to ask yourself these questions: Did we do everything today as effectively as possible? Was my staff treated fairly? Did I let pride get in my way or did I admit that I may not always be right? Once you answer these questions, move on to something relaxing. For me that thing is my knitting. (Go ahead and laugh — I can take it.)
• Critical decisions. Making critical decisions obviously is stressful. This is not the time to have so much pride that you don’t ask for help. If you’re not 100 percent sure, ask someone. I went to other superintendents all the time — even times when I knew I was right but just wanted reassurance.
• Time management and appreciation. Keep a weekly log and report everything you do — everything. You’ll be surprised at the numbers you see. Compare your weekly charts to see if you are being efficient. I tried this and was astonished at how much time I could save if I looked at all the jobs and combined those that I could.
• Show appreciation. Make sure you reward your crew by showing them appreciation. You don’t have to be a millionaire to do this. A simple thank you goes a long way and a pat on the back does wonders.
These are but a few of the tips I’ve managed to retain in my wee head over the course of my 30 years as an assistant superintendent, superintendent and finally the director of golf. Granted, as the latter I may have caused stress to some of you, but that happens at all levels.
Unfortunately, I didn’t realize everything I’ve said here when I was coming through the ranks. I now know there were so many more ways to do things that could have been more beneficial to my health.
These things would not have stopped the diseases, but it may have made my family happier through the years, and that’s what’s most important. I look back at lost time with other projects, with family and friends that I will never see again. I risked my own health simply because I did not know what was important.
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